Zoo Station

Week 5:  June 28-July 4

Blog update, blog update. I never really know how to start these (or continue or end them). I always try to mentally note everything I want to write throughout the week, but I usually forget most of it, and the end result is never the same as what I expect. So we’ll see where this goes. As you will see, it’s pretty long and a little disconnected because I wrote it over the period of a couple of days. Hopefully it all makes sense in the end.

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As I am writing this, I am sitting in the dining hall, in a chair, with my legs propped up on a windowsill, facing the front beach. It’s a beautiful day outside—probably in the 70s with clear blue skies—as opposed to every other day this week, where it was probably in the low 50s and overcast and drizzly. There’s a slight breeze outside, and I can see the ocean water moving with it. The mountains are a pale bluish gray against the greenish blue of the water. The hummingbirds are swarming around the feeder as usual. I forgot to mention how many hummingbirds are around here. I’ve seen probably fifteen or twenty at a time around one of the two feeders, and Pat, our cook, has to fill up each of them about four times a day. Last weekend I got to stand outside with the feeder in my hands while the little birds landed on my fingers and drank the sugar water.

The first Colt camp week is over. In case you forgot, Colt camp is for the 7- to 9-year-olds. To be completely honest, I wasn’t excited at all about counseling this week. I was tired of getting assigned to little kids, as it often felt more like glorified babysitting than spiritually guiding. On Monday morning, I was tired, the weather was yucky, and my heart just wasn’t feeling the joy that it should have been. And I was called out on it. And it was humbling. I was asked why I was tired—since I had essentially gotten the weekend off—and whether I had prayed about it. I realized at that moment that I hadn’t prayed about it at all. So after I finished mopping the dining hall after breakfast, I headed to my cabin for the week and prayed. I asked God to help me be joyful, that He would bless each of my girls, and that He would give me the strength, endurance, and wisdom to do His work this week.

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It’s a little later now. We just got done with our praise and prayer session for the week. The adults have now taken off their “counselor” suits and given full vent to the wild and crazy that has been building up inside of them for the past few days. It happens every weekend after the kids leave. Tomorrow the group is going to town to sight see, shop, and be in the July Fourth parade. It’s supposed to be a pretty big deal around town, so it should be a pretty good time.

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It is now Saturday evening, and we just returned from town. It was a blast. The weather was hot (80s) but absolutely gorgeous. We drove into Auke Bay/Juneau on Thursday afternoon. Half the group decided to hike up to the Mendenhall Glacier, and the other half did the tourist thing downtown. I chose the latter. We did get to see the glacier from a distance, though (and a little black bear cub wandering near a neighborhood on the way there!). There were icebergs floating in the water around it. It was probably the most Alaskan thing I’ve seen so far.

When we got into downtown Juneau, I walked around with a few other counselors and hit every souvenir shop ever. I spent a pretty decent amount of money on Alaskan gear for my family (and Ashley). The highlight of the day was probably hanging out at Heritage Coffee Company and ordering coconut/chocolate gelato and a London fog. I haven’t chilled in a coffee shop since I left home, and it was glorious. I also had the opportunity to make a bunch of phone calls, so that was refreshing as well. Ashley and I did our usual hour-ish conversation, and I talked to each of my family members for varying amounts of time. I ate at the Twisted Fish for dinner and had Alaskan lox and salmon on mini bagels. It was kind of gross.

That evening was interesting. We gathered with the rest of Juneau near the docks to watch the fireworks. It doesn’t get darker around there until 11:30 or 12, so they started around midnight. The people there are fascinating. I told a couple others on staff that this was not the Alaska I expected. Whenever I thought of this state, I always pictured snow and Eskimos. I wouldn’t expect “real” people to live here. But there are emo and goth and punk rocker kids here in Alaska, just like anywhere else. There are also the adults who walk around drunk, high, and/or scantily clad. And there are also the “normal” folk, the granola, the tourist. You will find every type of person in that city. It was neat to see the natives as well – they have very distinct features, almost like a mix of other, more familiar races. Anyway, the fireworks were good. Not the best show of all time, but nowhere near horrible either. We had fun. Being out in the “real world” makes you homesick for camp, though. I think I mentioned this last time I went to town. You get accustomed to the “bubble” of camp life – free of excessive distraction, loud noises, “worldly” people. You learn to love being immersed in an authentic and spiritual environment with people who lead that kind of life. It’s stimulating, refreshing, reviving, food for the soul. You learn that the world is none of those things. It’s good to get a taste of it, though. You find out what kind of life those kids go home to. Your heart breaks for the souls of the lost. You become all the more driven to do the work the Lord has set before you – to go forth and make disciples of all nations. It’s a beautiful and yet sweetly bitter task.

Today was the Juneau parade. Like I said, this thing is a big deal. Echo Ranch made a “wild, wild West” themed float, and we handed out candy and camp brochures to the spectators. There were so many people! People were watching from bar entrances, rooftops, balconies, sidewalks, everywhere. It was awesome hearing so many people cheer for Echo Ranch as we walked by. This place has more of a reputation than I had expected. I’m pretty sure about every kid ever got a brochure. As we walked down the streets, I prayed that God would use this opportunity to bring all kinds of new kids to camp to hear the Good News. I hope our work was not in vain. We ran into several kids who had already been to camp this summer, including a few of my girls. It was great to hear the girls yell my name, and a couple of them even ran up to give me a hug. I guess I wasn’t the worst counselor ever after all.

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And now, back to our story. I had the privilege of toting around six little girls Monday through Thursday. (One of them was named Arwen. When I asked her if her parents named her after the elf from Lord of the Rings, she said that she was given the name because she was born with pointy ears.) I also had a JC (junior counselor) in my cabin, so naturally it turned into a good cop/bad cop situation. Oh well. Emily, my JC, did a fantastic job with the girls, and I don’t think I could have survived the week without her. The girls were sweethearts, but they were a little wild sometimes. Someone made this observation: “The thing about Colt campers is that they’re alive. They’re not dead.” These kids move. They talk. They fidget. They don’t really understand the depth of the Father’s love or the magnitude of salvation, yet the faith of a child is nothing to scoff at. While I can’t remember any specific comments, a few of my girls said some very simply profound things about God. It was incredible to hear their perspective, to get a taste of the simple and endearing faith that they had in Jesus. Three of my girls were already saved, so three weren’t. One of them prayed on Wednesday night, “Dear Jesus, I want You to come into my life. Amen.” And did those angels in heaven ever rejoice.

Passion for the gospel and service was a big theme this week for the counselors. It seemed like that passion had already fizzled out, and people were turning into robots. We brought it up during our daily counselor devotions. One guy told a story about how he could have shared the gospel with a new friend he met at basketball camp when he was 12, but he didn’t. Two weeks later, he learned that his friend’s dad had shot his whole family and himself. The story really brought the urgency of sharing the Good News to the forefront. It’s nothing to be shy or embarrassed about; as Christians, we are supposed to go out and sow the seed, and the Lord is the Lord of the harvest. As if I wasn’t already, I felt like I shoved the gospel down my kids’ throats every night during devotions this week. It probably got redundant and maybe even annoying, but I hope they don’t forget it.

That was another of many lessons God taught me this week. He didn’t stop there, though. I let my guard down this week and decided to go all out for the camp songs. You see, the camp songs are all super cheesy kids tunes with motions, and they were probably created to make you feel ridiculous while singing praises. Kind of like the Bible story about David dancing before the Lord. So I gave up looking cool and just went crazy. My girls loved it, and it helped them get into the songs too. And I actually did have a blast.

Colt camp includes a carnival in the gym on the last night. All the counselors wore funny hats and were put in charge of different stations. I ran the single-holed mini golf station, which was a good time. Everyone also got lots of free popcorn and cotton candy. As far as I know, only one camper experienced her cotton candy consumption in reverse.

The girls had been excited all week about getting to ride horses on Wednesday. When we got there, though, one of the younger ones became scared to death and started crying because she thought she would fall off. After much coaxing, she finally got on the horse and was led away for the ride. When the group returned about twenty minutes later, however, she was beaming from ear to ear. She had a blast and wanted to go again – only this time she wanted to go faster than a walk. It was pretty cool to see such a little kid successfully overcome a big fear.

The worst part of Colt camp was definitely when the girls had to pack up. They got distracted every five minutes and could never get it all knocked out at once. I discovered that one girl’s mom packed her five pairs of shoes into her giant suitcase: sparkly pink flats (which, of course, she wore all week long), tennis shoes, rain boots, and two pairs of the same shoes (different colors). Nice. I can’t even count how many times I heard, ‘I can’t find ____!’ before they actually looked for it. I think we probably spent somewhere between one and two hours packing Thursday.

A five-page letter from Ashley brightened that day for me, though. I started reading it in the Trading Post while my children were running wild with their most recent purchases. I had just turned on the coffee maker to heat up the existing coffee and produce a fresh brew (free for the counselors!), so I got through most of it while the coffee brewed away. I felt like I was in a movie scene, where the main character is standing in the middle of the picture, still and silent, in the midst of the chaos and madness around him. I decided it was a good time to check on the coffee – and then I came to the realization of my terrible mistake. The pot was already mostly full when I started brewing a new one, so the new coffee had filled up the pot and then started spilling over onto the floor. Sweet. I let Emily handle the crumb chasers (another endearing term for our Colt campers) while I ran to get some towels. I guess I should start saving the letter reading for nights and weekends.

So that was the camp week. The previous Sunday was awesome, although I didn’t get to see a bear. The counselor group canoed along the cove out to Sawmill Creek, which is a beautiful creek that runs through the woods and has an incredible waterfall. When we got to the creek, we crossed a log that went over the water to the other side and then hiked up to the waterfall. When we got to the fall, I decided I wanted to see it from the other side of the creek, so I tried wading along the edge of the water (in my rain boots) to see if I could find a shallow place to cross. Bad decision. I slipped on a rock while stepping through the water, and fell in, waist deep. That water was cold! I had a minor freak out moment as I tried to catch my breath and find an actual foothold (and then slipped again), but eventually I made it out. And then I just walked through the water to the other side since I was soaked anyway. It made for a funny story, however, even though I had to pour the water out of my rain boots more than once.

In addition to counseling, I have been asked to lead worship for Maverick II camp (12- to 15-year-olds) this week, which is crazy. I like being able to provide background vocals every now and then, but I’ve never led before. I’m a little nervous, and it probably won’t get better come Monday. But, as it has been said, Echo Ranch is a place where someone becomes someone they weren’t originally because they learn to do all kinds of new things. Maybe this is one of those things. God has a funny way of working out that kind of stuff. I’m a lot more nervous about counseling, though. This will be my fourth week of counseling but my first week with “big” kids. These girls will probably have bigger issues than not being able to find their towels or needing to go to the bathroom in the middle of chapel. As deeply affected as the counselors were during the last Maverick week, I can’t imagine how this one will go. But God will move. And I have a lot of praying to do.

I think that basically wraps up the longest post ever. Thanks to Ashley, Nina, Mallory, and Bethany for the letters last week! And happy (late) birthdays to Maddie, Morgan, and Mom!

Sometimes You Can't Make It on Your Own

Week 4:  June 21-27

Well, another week down.  Soccer camp was much different than what I expected or what I had experienced that first week of Bronco camp, but it was good.  God continued to show His faithfulness, despite my lack of faith.  It never gets old, does it?

I had seven girls this week, and they were crazy.  There were two 11-year-olds and five 9-year-olds.  A few of them bought stuffed animals at the camp gift shop (Berner’s Bay Trading Post/Trading Post/BBTP), and they thought it would be a good idea for two of them to get married.  So Monday night was the official engagement ceremony.  They laid out a blanket in front of the romantically lit stove, aligned the eager stuffed animal spectators on each side, made a ring/bracelet out of yellow thread, and the frog proposed (or “purposed”, as they spelled it on the sign they made to commemorate the event) to the pig.  Or maybe it was the other way around.  The wedding was the next day, but I missed it.  I think they were more excited about the proposal than the wedding.

My girls were all very different but got along great as a cabin.  One of them liked to give at least one hug every five minutes or so.  It drove me crazy.  I think God did it on purpose, since physical touch is one of my lowest love languages on the scale.  Two of them were good friends and pretty rambunctious, running late to just about everything.  One reminded me of my ex-roommate Bethany because she loved Twilight, Harry Potter, and reading overall.  Another was kind of a loner and pretty quiet.  One of them had a fantastic attitude all week and was very mature beyond her years, and the last one was a sweetheart but always had a problem with interrupting everyone. 

The girls all seemed pretty eager to talk to me individually.  One in particular poured her heart out to me as we walked all around camp after the others were in bed.  She told me about how her sister and parents were always screaming at each other and how her friends weren’t making very good choices.  She always worried about her family and didn’t enjoy being home.  I really didn’t know what to tell her.  All I knew to do was offer her hope—that God would get her through this and make her stronger, all for His glory.  I told her she just had to hang in there and pray.  It felt very much like a Sunday school answer, and I could tell that what I said didn’t seem to resonate very much, but she said that it was always a relief to be able to talk to someone about.  She told me she felt like a bottle, that all her emotions were just building up inside with no way to get out.  After we finished talking, I prayed that God would give me wisdom to know what to say to her later.  Once again, He was on the ball.  During one of the devotionals led by the head coach, he talked about how God wants us to endure through different kinds of trials, one of which included problems at home.  He said it a couple of times, and I hope that the girl caught it like I did.  I felt encouraged because he said basically the same things I did the night before. 

Oh yeah, I finally caught the Plague (cold/congestion yuckiness) that has been circulating throughout the staff.  And then I gave it to two or three of my girls.  I’m the best counselor ever.  It’s pretty much gone now, though I still have kind of a nasty cough.

The kids had soccer practice in the morning and in the afternoon.  In the evening was tournament play, where all the kids were split up into teams of four or five players each.  The games usually went pretty smoothly, though the horses wandered out into the field and between the soccer goals a couple of times.  I wasn’t around for most of the practices or tournaments, but they needed a coach/extra player during the last tournament, so I was the goalie.  Thankfully, I didn’t have many balls come my way.  It was fun to reminisce about playing my senior year, and it made me wish I had stuck around for more of the skills instruction this week so I could have learned a few things.  The coaches were incredible.  The head coach, Tom, was born with cerebral palsy.  While he had to use a cane to get around, he interacted great with the kids.  He was very inspirational, both on the field and during devotions in the chapel.  His wife Nicole and assistant Emily also helped coach the kids during the week.  In addition to soccer skills, they also taught the kids cup stacking for coordination practice.  I got to learn too, which was pretty sweet.  After the kids left on Friday, the coaches and a few of the counselors spent about two hours playing with the cups.  We built a giant triangular tower of cups that was probably eight feet tall or so.  It was awesome.

Our devotions before bed were awesome.  Much like my last cabin, these girls had a lot of questions, many of which I didn’t know how to answer.  One of my favorites was:  “Does God ever have fun?  In the Bible, He always sounds so serious.”  I didn’t really know what to say.  I’m sure God does have fun, and I guess I could have said things like He delights in us and in pouring out His love on us, but I couldn’t think of anything in the Bible that proved that God has fun.

Cabin clean up went a lot better this week than the first week.  The girls got really into it, and we even won one day!  I took a bunch of party decorations from the program office, and we decorated the cabin with streamers, balloons, and hanging beads.  I had also saved some cookies from the day before and set those and two cups of Gatorate out for the cabin cleanup checkers.  The girls were stoked, so I rewarded them with brownies and milk while they were playing on the playground the next day.

On Thursday night, the soccer group had a campfire out on the beach.  We all sat around for a couple hours and reflected on the events of the week.  The coaches then had the group say nice things about each person.  When it came to me, one of the nine-year-old boys stood up and said, “I think Reagan is really pretty.”  When everyone started laughing, he went on:  “That’s right!  I said it!”  It was hilarious.  Too bad he couldn’t have been about 12 years older.

The kids walked out Friday, so Saturday was a wonderful day of rest and relaxation for me.  I spent a few hours talking to some of the counselors about different spiritual issues.  Once again, the Lord answered my prayers for Him to reveal Himself to me.  For various reasons, I had really been struggling in my faith this last week and wanted evidence that God was really there.  I started reading Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis—which has been fantastic so far—but I still felt like something was missing.  But hearing about the ways in which God has acted in the lives of others was the most effective way to get the point across, and He knew it.  It is so refreshing being around the people here.  Everyone is so genuine and open about their faith.  Talking about God and spirituality seems almost as natural as breathing, and I feel like I’m learning new things every time I talk to someone about it.  I’m hoping that won’t be lost once I leave “the bubble” – one of the three in which I live at this point.

Today was also a glorious day, but I’ll get into that in the next post.  Thanks to all of you for your letters, prayers, and many words of encouragement.  Next week I’ll be counseling for Colt camp, which is for the 7- to 9-year-olds (the “ankle biters”).  Good times. 

Love and Peace Or Else

Week 3:  June 14-20

Happy Father’s Day, and big up to my Dad back in Oklahoma! I miss you.

Work staff week is over, and now it’s on to camp #3. We have four different camps this week: basketball, soccer, wilderness, and horse. Here’s the best part: I’m counseling girls in soccer camp! Those of you who know me well are aware that I have zero athletic ability and have only played/hated soccer my senior year of high school. As far as I know, though, I won’t actually be playing, just herding the girls from place to place and leading devotions. The schedule is supposedly more lax than regular camp, so I will probably have a little more free time, and it won’t be as stressful. But I guess I’ll know for sure when the time comes.

Maverick #1 (ages 12-15) week ended yesterday. Even though I didn’t counsel last week, I still got to be involved with the kids during my free time station hours (inflatable boxing, sky trolley/zipline, etc.). They seemed like awesome kids, and the counselors could attest to that. We all heard amazing stories from each other about how God used situations or chapel topics or evening devotions to work in the hearts of the kids or the chemistry of the cabin. He never fails to carry you when you just surrender everything over to Him. That continues to be the biggest lesson I’ve learned (over and over) so far.

Friday was Crud Wars day. This game is basically an organized outdoor food fight. Two teams at a time grab one substance at a time (flour, wet dog food, spaghetti noodles, shaving cream, etc.) and throw it at each other. Once everyone is finished throwing one kind of thing, they move on to the next one. The kids were told that morning that they wouldn’t be doing Crud Wars this week; instead, they would be playing a “better” game called Madness. At dinner that night, Jon-Michael got up to make an announcement. He said that Pat, the head cook, had forgotten to save food throughout the week for Crud Wars, so that was the reason we wouldn’t be able to play. Even though she had made this frustrating mistake, he had decided to forgive her and we should too. When he turned around to announce that we should all forgive Pat, she threw a pie in his face, and the madness began! The cooks had just set out huge bowls of slop on the tables, and Pat threw the first handful at a camper’s face. A massive food fight ensued for about the next five minutes and then moved outside and morphed into actual Crud Wars. Only a handful of people knew this was going to happen in advance, so it was definitely a shock to most of us. The dining hall was a disaster, and it took about two hours to clean up. We all had fun doing it, though, and it was worth it. Apparently it was the first food fight ever at Echo Ranch. We made a memory!

Friday night chapel was one to remember. Several of the counselors performed the Lifehouse skit (look it up on YouTube), and it really hit home with most of the people there. After the skit was over, Tim and Kirk (the guys counselors who lead worship) got up to sing “How Deep the Father’s Love for Us”, and Kirk couldn’t get through it without crying. This started a chain reaction of tears among the kids, which lasted throughout all of Jon-Michael’s message afterwards. Many even left during the talk and then came back at the end. At the end of the message, he played the song from the skit (“Everything” by Lifehouse), and the kids and their counselors just sat and wept. Honestly, I’m still not sure what I think about it all. I believe that many of those tears where a genuine cry out to God after realizing what He had done for them, some were a form of empathy for friends, some stemmed from indirect peer pressure, and others were the result of physical and emotional exhaustion. Some were probably a combination of all of the above. Jon-Michael explained it well: these kids are so tightly wound all year long between camps, and they needed a way to release it all. That night was the night to do it. Whatever the reason, I’m glad the kids got the opportunity to let it all out. It seemed to provide a great way to present the gospel and show God’s love and comfort to those who were hurting. I hope decisions and changes that were made last beyond camp, as I hoped with my girls from the week before. But that’s not in our hands – all we can do is give it over.

Yesterday was a good day. The counselors had their “praise and prayer” session in the Loft after all was said and done. Most of us practically fell asleep during the prayer part, but it was still great to finally relax with people our own age. Afterwards was chick night with the nurses (Denise and Laurie), a few counselors (Nikki, Amber, and Skylar), and the work staff head person (Erin). We spent the next couple hours gabbing and eating ice cream and sharing funny stories… and just having a blast.

Like I kind of touched on in my last post, I had a much harder time feeling connected to and hearing from God this week. It was frustrating, but this is the way we grow. He continues to teach me, even when I’m not aware of it. Jon-Michael told a story on Friday night about a man talking to a woman on an airplane. He asked her, ‘If you got to Heaven after you died, and Jesus weren’t there, would you still want to be there?’ Following that story, I realized that I have come to the point where I truly want Him above all else. It came to me while I was talking to Him at the top of the sky trolley, and it made me cry. It’s an indescribably wonderful feeling – blessed assurance, Jesus is mine. What else in this life really matters apart from Him? How could I desire a life on earth or an eternal life in Heaven without Him there? I couldn’t.

I posted Denise Pritt’s “ERBC 2009” album to my Facebook profile. Make sure you check it out to see pictures of Echo Ranch Idol, the food fight, and other junk.

Miracle Drugs

Week 3:  June 14-20

I've been loading up on Vitamin C since I got here, so I have yet to get sick like almost every other counselor here. Sweet. I have also continued to abuse the free coffee/tea bar. It is a glorious thing.

This week I have been cleaning bathrooms, washing dishes, setting tables, painting walls, and hitting kids with swimming pool noodles. Tomorrow I will be cleaning outhouses! Despite the drudgery of the busy work, God has been teaching me to have a servant's heart. I'm not sure whether that is something you learn or something you just make a conscious decision to have. The Bible says to do everything for the glory of God; in this way, men will see your good works and praise the Lord. Maybe joyfully scrubbing toilets will have that effect. Maybe not. If nothing else, maybe it will elicit my praise.

When someone gets mail at camp, they are required to stand up in front of everyone in the dining hall and sing (and dance to) “Gray Squirrel.” If you are not familiar with that song, it goes like this:


Gray squirrel, gray squirrel,
Shake your bushy tail.
Gray squirrel, gray squirrel,
Shake your bushy tail.

Crinkle up your little nose.
Stick it down between your toes.

Gray squirrel, gray squirrel,
Shake your bushy tail.


Good times. I’ve done it two or three times now. The “shake your bushy tail” part requires you to turn around and shake your rear end at your audience, but it’s not so embarrassing anymore. Keep on sending that mail!

I have gotten to help lead worship a few times in chapel, and that has been a blast. Our silly skit night also went really well, including my part as Susan Boyle in “Echo Ranch Idol.” I wore a frizzy-haired gray wig and drew bushy eyebrows on my face. There will be pictures someday.

Hope everyone back on the homefront is doing well. Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers! Love to all.

Crumbs from Your Table

I accidentally posted content from "Vertigo (1)" into "Vertigo (2)", but the second one is, in fact, updated. So make sure you read it!

It's a strange experience, being thrust back into civilization after hiding out in the woods for two whole weeks. I felt a little like Thoreau in his value of Walden Pond. Once you get to this kind of place, you get used to living simply. There are more important things to worry about than seeing movies or hanging out at Target or getting stuck at traffic lights. You learn to appreciate the company of others who have nothing to hide, or the beauty of the sun setting behind the mountains, or the magnificent bald eagles you see flying overhead, or the fingerprints of God on the faces of the children you meet each week. These are the things that make life on earth worthwhile.

There wasn't a whole lot to see back in town, to my surprise. Juneau has a very "small town" feel to it. The streets are lined with little shops and restaurants, probably to attract tourists. The scenery is breathtaking. The mountains are a lot farther away back at camp, but you are right next to them once you get to Auke Bay/Juneau. Two other girls and I spent about 20 minutes searching for an open coffee shop before the concert, but to no avail. We had to settle for coffees at McDonald's, but I guess it was worth it. Everyday Sunday did a pretty good job, though I didn't know any of their songs. After the show was over and I had successfully withdrawn cash from the ATM machine (yay, now I finally have real money!), we all headed over to Fred Meyer to purchase our respective necessities. I finally bought some eyeliner to replace the one that disappeared into the abyss of nothingness and shampoo to replace the bottle I never had. I also picked up the Red Hot Chili Peppers' "Best Of" album because it was $7. Who could pass that up, right?

Camp has started again, this time for 12- to 15-year-olds. I'm on work staff for the week, so I get to do things like mop floors and wash dishes and paint ceilings and scrub bath houses. It's not always the most fun thing ever, but I'm doing my best to have a good attitude about it. The Bible says to be joyful in all things. Lord, help me!

Vertigo (2)

Week 2:  June 7-13

WEDNESDAY:

Wednesday was Crazy Hair Day. I didn’t do anything too wild, but a couple of my girls stuck sticks or other foreign objects in their hair. Since we failed miserably at cabin cleanup the day before, we made all kinds of decorations for the cabin, including a welcome sign on the front door, verses posted on the walls, and some Famous Amos cookies for the cabin cleanup checkup crew. I gave my 3-5 minute condensed testimony in chapel that morning, which went pretty well. I included a verse that has been significant to me over the last several days:

“…we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” Romans 5:3-5

I read it Monday night, and it encouraged me every time I felt like I just wanted to give up – which was just about every night as I sat in chapel with loud music and rowdy girls. If this kind of work doesn’t blow some suffering, perseverance, character, and certainly hope right into ya… Then something is wrong. And God was faithful to answer every desperate prayer and guide me through the whole thing. It was incredible to see Him work right in front of my face time and time again. But I’ll get to that.

I had been feeling really discouraged about the lack of connection I had been making with the girls. I wanted to spend quality time with each of them, to find time to get to know them on a personal level. With all there was to do, it seemed like it couldn’t be done, and I felt like a failure. After the girls were dismissed to their skills classes, I went back to the cabin and started crying. Then I really felt like I should just pray for my girls. I prayed over each bunk in that room and bawled my ever-lovin’ eyeballs out. I felt such a burden for them—I knew that, even though I could try teaching them as much as I could this week, I couldn’t protect them forever. I knew that struggles would come in their future. I wanted to be able to guide and shield them from the oncoming storm of life. And then I realized that that wasn’t my place. So I surrendered it to God. I told Him that I knew I couldn’t protect them and guide them through life’s troubles, but He could.

After my breakdown, I decided to run back to the dorm to get ready for bed before free time and chapel. Feeling a little more encouraged and empowered by God’s touch, I really wanted to tell someone about what had been going on with me and my cabin. I prayed that God would provide someone to share these things with. I walked into the dining hall, visited with people for a couple minutes, came back down, and then ran into the girls’ CA (camp assistant), Alison. She asked me how I was doing, and I said I was alright. Then she asked if she could pray with me, and I told her that would be great. Almost as soon as she started, I started crying. She knew the exact words to pray and the condition of my heart. When she was finished, I told her about everything that was going on with me and my girls: I was worried about connecting with them one-on-one, I had just prayed for each of them, and I felt lost as to how to give them spiritual guidance. She was so encouraging and told me I had been doing a fantastic job. When I went downstairs, I realized that God had just answered another prayer within 5 minutes of it being uttered, and I started crying again! I probably looked ridiculous brushing my and wiping tears from my eyes at the same time, but I couldn’t help it. He didn’t leave me hanging.

I had “lifeguard” duty that night during free time. I wasn’t too excited about going to sit on the beach by myself for an hour, but it turned out to be one of the most refreshing times of my whole week. I sat on a log, stared at the water and the sky, buried my feet in the sand, and scratched the letters of “Reagan <3s>

I had my “mom” Lyn come talk to the girls during our cabin devotions that night. It was great to hear her testimony and way of telling the girls what each of their memory verses meant.

THURSDAY:

Thursday was definitely my favorite theme of the week: Tacky Day. I rocked a blue dress with a floral shirt, a bright beaded necklace, polk-a-dot rain boots, and sunglasses. It was also a great day for connecting with each of the girls – I was a little more lax than usual and made sure to talk to almost all of them about where they were spiritually. I talked to one girl who believed in God and Jesus Christ but who had never asked Him to live in her heart, so I told her I woul be happy to pray with her whenever she wanted. I thought she had forgotten about it after awhile, but she came up to me later to say that she and one of the other girls (to whom I had also talked) would like to pray with me later that night. I was ecstatic.

I had promised them all week that we would make s’mores as a cabin, so for “cabin time” I grabbed the supplies from the pantry, started a fire in the stove, and let them go crazy. It was a blast. They also won both of their Quiz Quest matches that afternoon, so that was a plus as well.

It’s a camp tradition to have a bonfire on the beach the last night of camp, so after chapel everyone headed down to the waterfront, sang worship songs, and listen to Jon-Michael share the gospel. At our cabin devotions that night, I asked the girls what they thought about what was said. Naturally, they had a lot of questions that I can’t really remember now, but that wasn’t as important as what happened a little later. Two of my girls became Christians that night. We clapped and cheered like the angels in heaven. (One girl then asked us to quiet down because she had ‘sensitive ears,’ and I very nicely told her to get over it because this was more important.) I wanted to find the Bible passage that talked about the angels in heaven rejoicing each time a sinner repents, and after I found it, the girls asked me to read some more. We stayed up awhile later reading the story of the prodigal son and the one where Jesus healed the paralytic. The girls ate it up. I loved seeing the eagerness in their faces. Where does that joy over the Word go as you get older?

FRIDAY:

The last day of camp had finally come. I was in charge up hooking kids up to the sky trolley (zipline) that morning during free time, and I had a blast talking to the other campers who weren’t in my cabin. Very few of them were ready to head back home. Several of them were scared to death of being 50 feet off the ground, and it felt awesome to encourage them to the point where they finally took that leap of faith. I only almost fell off the platform once. Good times.

I had the chance to give each of them a Bible before they were all packed up. The girls absolutely loved them, and two of them asked me to sign theirs. A few of them just sat on a bunk, flipping through them and reading verses here and there. Their zeal for the Word will never cease to amaze and inspire me.

It was hard to see those girls go. I didn’t think I would be too sad to see that tractor pull away with all of them on the trailer in the back, but of course, after all the hugs, waves, and goodbyes, I started crying. (It didn’t go unnoticed. Just before they were out of earshot, I heard one of them yell, ‘Reagan’s crying!’) It got worse as I did the final cabin cleanup. What now? What would the new believers’ families think? Would they read their Bibles? Would they make good choices when they got older? Would their love for growing in the knowledge of God continue? Once again, I had to remember that I wasn’t put in charge of their future. God would protect them.

That night, all the counselors from that week and those on work staff gathered together to discuss our respective “highs” and “lows” of the week. It was a great time for “soul-grabbing” and being authentic with everyone, which is right up my alley. I shared about how God had been faithful to answer my prayers that week and the ways He had taught me that I could not handle everything on my own. Others had similar testimonies. After everyone had shared, we prayed together. It was such a powerful experience to hear the things the Lord had laid on people’s hearts.

SATURDAY:

Jon-Michael talked the night before about how counselors take off their “counselor clothes” when the camp week is over – and then go crazy. Saturday was the culmination of the madness. We all went into “camper” mode yesterday, which was pretty funny. It was definitely a good day to practice our “silly skits”, which we will be performing this Tuesday night. One of them is called “Echo Ranch Idol,” in which I will be playing the part of Susan Boyle. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, look it up on YouTube.) I’m pretty excited about it.

While having free time was wonderful, I was feeling a little bummed about being “useless” – without real responsibility or accountability to anyone. I also felt very distinctly that I hadn’t really grown in my relationships with the other counselors, so I prayed that I would be able to connect with them. When God answers prayer, He answers prayer. It was awesome. Everyone gathered in the dining hall that night to play games, eat corn dogs and pretzels, and just hang out. I sat and talked about God, the Bible, and personal/spiritual weaknesses with four other counselors that night. I don’t remember any other time in my life where I had truly experienced such fellowship with other believers. We weren’t being forced into a Bible study; no one had told us to go talk about Jesus in a small group with our list of required questions; we were just being real with each other. I don’t know what could be better than that.

SUNDAY:

This morning I got to help lead worship in chapel, and tonight we’re heading into town to attend an Everyday Sunday concert, go to Fred Meyer (the local Wal-Mart), and make a zillion phone calls. Should be a great break from living in the middle of nowhere.

I received a letter from Ashley, a CD from Josh, and another letter from Nina this week. They were great – thank you! And keep sending them!

I have learned and grown so much this week. Among many other things, I have become entirely convinced that God is faithful to complete the work He has started in and through us. When you pray, He will answer you one way or another. And when He answers, talk about it! This is how we bring glory to His Name. I have loved being able to share answers to prayer with others over the past few days, and I don’t want to stop. I hope this has encouraged you to do the same.

Vertigo (1)

Week 2:  June 7-13

Wow.  So Bronco I (first camp for 10- and 11-year-olds) week is over.  I can now say that I succeeded in being more tired this week than I was during my last post...  But it was all worth it.  This is going to be long, but I'll just start from the beginning.

MONDAY:

I could not start a fire in the stove inside my cabin to save my life.  I had to get help from my teammates more than once on getting a fire going that day, and I had to endure the ridicule of my girls.  Oh well.  It builds character, right?

The campers showed up in the late morning.  I had 8 girls in my cabin:  Chandler, Jimmie, Michaela, Samantha, Laurel, Maggie, Kelley, and Ashlee.  (One of them sounded exactly like the babysitter from The Incredibles – no joke.)  I also had a JC (junior counselor) named Lauren, and she was a huge help.  After getting a group picture, we all headed over to the opening rally and then had lunch.  We then did lots of other activities and things that I can’t remember now.

After chapel that night, we all came back, and I had one of my teammates make a fire for us.  The counselors are required to lead a devotional before the campers go to bed, which was actually my favorite part of the day.  When we were all ready for bed and had the fire going, I had my girls drag a few mattresses off their bunks and onto the floor around the stove so we could talk.  I asked them what they thought about the message in chapel and if they had any questions about God or the Bible.  Let me tell you, kids can think of the craziest questions.  “What if the people who wrote the Bible were wrong?”  “How do we know it’s real?”  “How did God begin?”  It was a great time to connect with the girls and get a feel for how many of them were familiar with the church and the Bible.  The night wasn’t so pleasant after bedtime, though.  I had told the girls it was okay to wake me up if they had any problems during the night or needed someone to take them to the bath house.  I had been informed earlier by the nurse that one of the girls was a bed-wetter, so I let the whole group know to let me know if they needed a new sleeping bag or anything else in the middle of the night.  One of them woke me up around 1am to take them to the bathroom.  Right after I got back, one of the girls walked up to me to say that she had wet the bed.  Awesome.  I had her put her wet clothes in a trashbag, took them to the laundry room, and made sure she was squared away before I went back to bed.

TUESDAY: 

Each day following Monday had a theme, and Tuesday was Camo Day.  I was excited because it meant I got to wear my new camo shorts for the first time, though I think I was the only one in my cabin who dressed up. 

There’s a time during the day that is specifically set aside for “cabin cleanup.”  According to the rules, you are supposed to have your cabin sweep the floor and outside porches, clean the shelves, make their beds, and hang up decorations on the inside.  The “cabin checkers” walk around about an hour later to assign points to each cabin for the quality of their work.  I did a rough sweep of the floors and had the girls make their beds, and they made a welcome mat out of leaves, sticks, and pine cones, but that was about it.   We failed cabin cleanup and got the lowest score of all the cabins.  My girls and I were pretty bummed, but I told them we would just do an awesome job for the next day.

After rotations (scheduled activities), the campers did a scavenger hunt, in which each cabin team raced all over camp.  Instead of hunting for items, though, campers had to complete tasks as a group, such as doing the hokey pokey or making a pyramid.  Those of us from the lower 48 (as they call the U.S. mainland) learned very quickly that Alaskans don’t do too well in the sun and heat.  It had been pretty warm and sunny all week, and it wore the kids out.  I couldn’t believe how much more energy I had than all these kids.  Most of my girls couldn’t run at all after 2 or 3 minutes of playing.  One of them in particular was always last and refused to walk more than about 11 steps per minute.  She complained the entire time, but it got to the point where I actually wanted to strangle her at the very end of the game.  She had been whining and dragging her feet the entire time, but she somehow found the energy to sprint to the end when another team was right on her tail.  I was fuming but glad it was finally over.

Throughout the week, Bronco I campers play a game called Quiz Quest.  This took me back to the glory days of Bible quizzing, so I was pretty excited about it.  Each cabin competed against each other and quizzed over questions about their memory verses they learned at the “flag raising/lowering” at the beginning and end of each day, their skills classes (canoeing, cooking, sports, horsemanship, etc.), and morning devotions.  They were also asked questions about the chapel messages, testimonies, and the people who spoke.  Like Bible quizzing, the campers sat on a bench and had to stand up when they wanted to answer the questions.  If cabins wanted extra points, they could memorize verses from a list given to them at the beginning of the week.  My girls memorized 10 verses total, so we got 1000 extra points (100 points for each verse) that day.  That definitely helped, in light of our failed cabin cleanup and the fact that my girls weren’t that good at quizzing.  Two of my girls actually choreographed a dance for Genesis 1:1, which was hilarious.  It will be posted to Facebook later this summer.

“Sweet Dreams” is the name of a kind of stealth mission that each cabin performs when they are “supposed” to be in bed.  Earlier that day, a staff worker told each of the counselors to pick a place to hide a plate of cookies, and they would take their cabins to find them later that night.  The idea is that the counselors are supposed to trick their campers into thinking that they had gotten one of their friends to hide some cookies for them, and they were supposed to sneak out of their cabins to obtain them without getting caught.  My girls loved it.  I told them that I had told Jon-Michael (one of the camp directors) how well they had done during the game, so he stashed some cookies for us on top of the swing set.  We sneaked around the outside of the cabin, through the forest, ducked in the trees because “someone’s coming!”, and sprinted down the beach along the treeline to the swingset.  After finding the plate of cookies by the slide, we went back the way we came.  The whole thing kind of backfired a little while later when my girls went to the bath house.  Girls from another cabin said that they had just gone on a mission to find their cookies, so I had to do much more lying than I would have liked afterwards to convince them that the game was real and that maybe Jon-Michael wanted to reward each cabin for doing well.  I think they bought it for the time being, which was fine with me.  I thought it was sweet that they really wanted to thank him for the cookies, which I made sure he knew about before they did.

Devotions that night were pretty intense.  I stayed up for a couple of hours with the girls, explaining the how Jesus’ death saved us, how Catholics can be Christians too, how to become a Christian, and other things they had questions about.  One of the girls wanted to tell me that she had just asked Jesus to forgive her sins (though she was already a Christian), and I learned later that week that another one of the girls asked Jesus into her heart that night.  The faith of children truly amazes me.  It seemed that a few of them couldn’t even fathom the idea that God might not exist.  They laughed as they said, “If God didn’t create the world, then how else would we be here?”  Their innocence and assurance of the truth was incredible to witness.

While the Lord saw fit to bless me with a non-bed-wetting cabin that night, I guess He thought it would be good for me to get woken up three times by a girl who couldn’t sleep.  After about 20 minutes of lying in bed, she came up to me and told me she couldn’t fall asleep.  I told her that she just needed to try.  The second time, I got up and prayed with her and tried to comfort her.  The third time (in my infinite patience), I told her that I couldn’t help her and that she just needed to go lie down and close her eyes.  She finally fell asleep a little while later.

This is good for now.  I’ll try to finish this week’s recap later tonight or tomorrow.